Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize