So drunk its hurt
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
