Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize