i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Girls should come with a carfax report
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize