I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
