No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
He is an equal opportunity slut.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
