i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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