he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
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