How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
