I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize