If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
