Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
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