Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Randomize
