I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
