Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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