She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
