I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
kristin has been a bad kristin
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
