ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
