You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize