I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
