I wannas sexs uuuuu
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
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