My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
sex in a hospital.. check
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
