4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
