no, he came in my armpit
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
where are you?
Hypothermia
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
