yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
