I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
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