theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
