Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
