is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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