dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
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