Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
