Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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