You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Randomize
