just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
