This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
