Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Shame - the story of my life.
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