Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
