I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Randomize