Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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