does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I'm really busy with my period
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