Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Randomize
