it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
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