That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
