Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
