i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
