He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Randomize
