Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Randomize
