Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
