This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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