i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
